Behavior jokes
You're like a cat, all you do is eat and sleep.
I can never get away from my dog, he follows me everywhere. I think you two would be really good friends.
The emo kid tried to give me a handshake. Sadly, I left him hanging.
Why did the chicken cross the road to get to the other site? Ah hah hah hah hah!
Stop being disrespectful to all those people and their parents. Oh, I forgot, they don't have any parents.
Memes
How many Emo kids does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, they sit in the dark crying.
None, they sit in the dark cutting their wrists.
Opinions are like orgasms. The only one that matters is mine and I don't care if you have one.
How come Mr. Squirrel watches porn sometimes?
Sometimes he feels like a nut, sometimes he don't.
What do people get for Christmas when they behave badly? They get coal. Why coal, you're probably saying, because the true meaning is cucks of all kinds.
What do emo kids and apples have in common?
They both hang off trees.
Why did the kid get grounded? Because he was always lion.
Mommy, mommy! Are we liars?
"Shut up and cross your fingers when you say that."
Why are my students so naughty?
Me: *finds out my dad's an orphan*
No one:
Literally no one:
Me: Time to make his life hell.😈
How do you win an argument against an emo kid?
Kick the chair out from under them.
Yo mamma so poor that when we went on a date, she took off her shoe laces and said "spaghetti."
HELP! HELP!
TELL THE PRIEST TO STOP TICKLING ME!
Why was Goofy in the bathroom?
He was goofing off!
Vital information: if you find a stray dog in an alleyway, don't stare at its eyes.
Mom, why was I adopted?
Because people are terrible, and that’s how the world works, son!
Ok, Dad, the world is TERRIBLE!