Animal jokes
What did the mouse say after its bath?
"I feel squeaky clean!"
Why was the sheep arrested?
Because he did a "ewe" turn on a motorway.
I have a fish that can breakdance, but only for 20 seconds and only once.
Q: What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?
A: Lickalotofpuss.
Q: If a cat says to a dog, "All dogs are liars," and the dog says to the cat, "All cats are liars," what does it mean?
A: It means cats and dogs can talk.
Where do bunnies go when they're sick?
The hoppital.
Rat
A cat in the desert be like:
YASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
What did the human say to the fly when it was buzzing around the human's head?
"Would you stop bugging me!"
Why do cat orphans watch sci-fi movies?
Because they won't understand what the mother ship is.
Why are theaters popular among cows?
They enjoy watching moovies.
What’s a squirrel’s favorite OTT? Nut-Flix.
If mistakes make people human, then your parents must have been alligators before you were born.
What do you call a skeleton snake?
A rattler!
"Koalafications" are irr-elephant.
My grandfather has the heart of a lion and a lifetime ban from the National Zoo.
Roses are red, violets are blue, a face like yours belongs in a place worse than a zoo.
Why can't cheetahs play any games?
Because they're cheetahs!
The man had no arms and a little girl came over and said, "Give me a high-five."
He said, "I’ve got no arms," and the girl said, "Are you an eel? Cause he don’t have arms."
Q: What do gay horses say?
A: "Geigh!"