Animal jokes
Before you leave that marriage, remember that one innocent 🐐 goat was killed for your traditional marriage. 😔
You're so ugly when a pig saw you, he said, "Yes, my brother is back."
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Fsh f-i-s-h (and the eye).
Why don’t alligators grow up to 15 feet?
They only have 4.
What do you call a chicken that catches ghosts? A poultrygeist.
Why did the dog want a kiss? Because he can see his knees.
While I was walking on the road, a cat crossed my road, and 5 min later I found it fell in the gutter.
What do you call a prehistoric crow? Crow-Magnon.
If I was a cow and could dance, I'd bust some moooooves while I uddered some lyrics!
If my cat were a cactus, doesn't that make him the catus?
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the side that he was not on.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To go to Chick-fil-A.
Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to.
What type of bee can't make up his mind?
A maybe.
You have to tell this to a friend:
There are 30 cows in a field. 20 ate 28 chickens. How many didn't? A: 10
Why is an elephant big, grey, and hairy?
Where do squirrels go for fun?
The acorn-ival.
How do you get a squirrel to be your friend?
Act like a nut.
What do you call a giraffe giving a blow job to another giraffe?
Getting neck!
Guys, I'm back...
Here's my joke:
What is blue and red all over?
Blood in the water of a shark attack victim.