Animal jokes
What's the difference between the Barracuda car and a fish?
The fish can't go fast.
What's a woodpecker's favorite kind of jokes?
Knock knock ones.
Q: What's the similarity between a dog and a bed?
A: I can jump on my bed. A: And I use a pillow on both of them.
What's a bison's favorite gun?
A PP Bizon.
What happens when animals do a squat?
It doesn't become pretty...
Memes
A fish is dead, who do you call? Aquaman!
What did the cow say to the other cow?
Moo you fine.
What goes boo in a car with no lips?
Q: If cats have cat babies, dogs have dog babies, and tigers have tiger babies, what do fish have?
A: Eggs.
I love my dog and all dogs.
Did you hear about the nasty tuna fish?
He was rotten to the albacore.
What do you call a stabbed pig?
Porkchopped.
What is a pig's favorite Food Network channel?
Pork Chopped!
Hah, got 'em (I guess)!
While I was walking on the road, a cat crossed my road, and 5 min later I found it fell in the gutter.
What chicken crossed the road? The donkey of the moneys.
A grasshopper walked into a bar and sat down at the counter.
The bartender looked at him and said, "We have a drink named after you." The grasshopper replied, "Who names a drink Steve?"
What do you call a cow that no one likes? The mooser.
What do you call a hippopotamus that stands out from the crowd?
A hipster!
Why did the dog want a kiss? Because he can see his knees.
Why can't antelopes get married?
Because they can't elope.
Why do you Scotchmen wear kilts?
Because sheep can hear a zipper from a mile away.