Animal jokes

What did the bird go to the hospital for?

For tweetment!

Why do cats like to sleep on the floor?

'Cause it's a car-PET.

What would be a pet's favorite thing to click on on this website?

Cat-egories.

Get it?

What does the blind man say when walking past the fish market?

“Good evening, ladies.”

What do you call a calf that is in no way brave?

A coward.

Snake one: Are we venomous?

Snake two: Yep!... Why do you ask?

Snake one: Cuz I just bit my tongue!!! (Drama scene)

What's the difference between a BMW and a porcupine?

Unlike the porcupine, the pricks are on the inside.

How did the shark do on his math test?

Jawesome!

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Because the one behind it wasn't social distancing.

How do bees get to school? On a school buzz.

What kind of clothing should you wear on “hump day”? Camelflouge.

What did the bison say to his son leaving for school?

"Bye son!"

Get it? Bye son, Bison!

Why does the owl 🦉 have a lot of friends?

Because he’s a hoot.

Why was the cow afraid?

Because he's a coward!

If I look after chickens, does that make me a chicken tender?

Tigger was playing hide & seek, so he looked in the toilet, but all he found was Pooh.

What did mommy spider say to baby spider?

You spend too much time on the web.

What did the mama moose say to the calf after it got on her nerves?

"I'm not a-moosed right now."

How do crabs honor their mom’s birthday? The shell-abrate.

I think I'm a red zebra!! Cuz I'm stripped red, iykwim.