Aed jokes
Why does a kid never come home after a fight with their parents? Because they never found the key to the house again.
There's a new Viagra and prune juice diet that's out.
Unfortunately, you can't tell if you're coming or going.
What's a lesbian's favorite candy?
Licorice.
Explain Bear teaches us that explaining the joke makes it a billion times funnier.
Why can’t Homer Simpson bring his family into Moe’s Tavern?
Because there’s a bartender in there.
When a woman says, "I need to be treated like a delicate flower," don't cut the wrong cord on the bomb.
Why was Trump banned from music class? He kept putting his finger on D minor.
What was Clinton encouraged to get in college? A minor.
Q: What do pedophiles use for allergic reactions?
A: An Epstein pen.
If Pete and Chasten Buttigieg had a baby, it would be a turd covered in semen.
What's the difference between a dead hooker and an onion?
I don't cry when I'm cutting up a dead hooker.
One way to not pick up a girl is to say, “Are you an American school because I wanna shoot kids into you?” I tried it on a girl, and she is now terrified to come near me.
How was I supposed to know she was already pregnant?
Yo mama so dumb, she put a watch in a piggybank and said she was saving time.
Due to her death, you can no longer get a letter from the Queen when you turn 100.
Instead, you now receive a text from Prince Andrew when you turn 14.
Why are Indian people bad at Monopoly?
Because whenever they hit the corner, they build a shop.
Roses are red, violets are blue, You told me I'm ugly, nah, you look like a monkey!
Did you hear? There's a new fast food restaurant coming: Jacko in the Box.
Kid 1: "It's a bird!"
Kid 2: "It's a plane!"
Me: "It's a terrorist!"
How do you stun a Scotsman?
Ask them to say "purple burglar alarm".
Q. Why did the pimp buy a journal?
A. To organize his thots.
Why do trannies suck at being soldiers? Because they have a 41% casualty rate.