Aed

Aed jokes

Child

    • I found a child on the street homeless, and they were really nice, so I took them home. Then I said, "Who's better, Biden or Trump?" They said they support Trump. They are now dead in my basement and have been for 3 years.

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    • Aed memes

    Catholic priest

    • What do you get when you cross a bisexual male that is a catholic priest and a christian police officer that is a bisexual male and a born again homophobic heteroflexable male that is a christian nationalist who is in the closet a gay man that needs to be force out of the closet by any means necessary?

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    • Helicopter

    • I heard Kobe was writing a book about helicopters, but it just wouldn't land with people...

    I know, I'm going to hell!

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    • Bowling Ball

    • What’s the difference between your sister and a bowling ball?

    I can only get 3 fingers in a bowling ball!

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    • Crush

    • What's the only good part of your crush dying before you have the chance to bang her?

    She can't say no!

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    • Necrophilia

    • A man is walking on a bridge and sees a lady over the railing.

    Man: "Ah, suicidal eh? Are you gonna jump?" Lady: "Yep. I hate this world." Man: "Well, if you're gonna die, can we have sex before you jump?" Lady: "Hell no! You creep!" Man: "Ok, fine. I guess I'll just wait until your corpse washes onto the shore."

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    • Cultural misunderstanding

    • A Chinese man moves to the USA after 50 years of living in Shanghai.

    He bought a home on a small piece of land.

    The friendly American neighbor decides to go across and welcome the new guy.

    He goes next door, but on his way up the driveway he sees the Chinese man running around his front yard, chasing about 10 hens.

    Not wanting to interrupt these "Chinese customs", he decides to put the welcome on hold for the day.

    Next day he decides to try again, but just as he is about to knock on the front door, he looks through the window and sees him urinate into a glass and then drink it.

    Not wanting to interrupt another "Chinese custom", he decides to put the welcome on hold for yet another day.

    A day later he decides to give it one last go, but on his way next door, he sees the neighbor leading a bull down the driveway and then put his left ear next to the bull's butt.

    The American dude can't handle this, so he goes up to the Chinese man and says, "Jeez man, what the hell is it with your Chinese customs? I come over to welcome you to the neighborhood and see you running around the yard after hens. The next day you are pissing in a glass and drinking it, and then today you have your head so close to that bull's butt, it could just about shit on you."

    The Chinese man is very taken back and says, "Sorry sir, you no understand, these no Chinese customs I am doing, these are American Customs."

    "What do you mean," says the neighbor, "Those aren't American customs."

    "Yes they are, man at travel agent tell me," replied the Chinese man. "He say to become true American, I must learn to chase chicks, get piss drunk, and listen to bull-shit!"

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    • Shit

    • I asked my nan if she wouldn't mind shitting in a bucket when we went camping. She replied, "Why the fuck would I want to sit in a bucket?" So eventually she did, and I took the best shit I have ever had!

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    • Hopscotch

    • A young, innocent little girl is playing hopscotch, and she says, "You step on a crack, you break your mama's back." Then she steps on a crack, so her mother's back proceeded to break slowly. Then she said, "You step on a line, you break your dada's spine," but the neighbor's spine broke, and in happiness, the thought-to-be previous father gets in his car and drives through the garage door...

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