Aed jokes
What is the difference between artificial vanilla and Marjorie Taylor Greene's children?
Artificial vanilla comes from a beaver's asshole, the children from an asshole's beaver.
Sometimes a depressed person is antidepression.
Moxxie: ThEy CaLlEd Me A pOsSuM!! i'M nOt A pOsSuM!!
Why can’t Hitler do track?
He can’t even finish a race.
What has teeth but doesn't use them to chew? The answer would be a comb or a piano, but technically, if you ripped someone's teeth out and hand them to them, they have teeth but can't chew with them.
Look, an orphan, let's go beat 'em up.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Bikini.
Bikini who?
Oh, that was just a bikini.
Son: Dad, what's a morbid joke?
Father: Walk over to a homeless man and throw a rock at him, then you will know.
Son: But Dad, I don't have arms or legs.
Father: Now you know.
A Souls fan raped me. He said, "Try finger, but hole."
Please help, my dad is an addict. He won't stop, and he eats my food.
Sometimes I think, should I kill him? But nah, he will go down with the others who did that too.
When Ariana Grande walked into the church, she said, "GOD IS A WOMAN!"
Hello, if you don't know me (which you probably don't), my name is watersharky, or WS, or Shark.
I am a normal, weird kid/preteen, and that's it. If you want more info on me, I will gladly share! Shark out.
Why is Santa always a b*tch, calling people names like, "Hoe, hoe, hoe?"
Mother got shot, damn.
Father got shot, damn.
Sister got shot, damn.
Brother got shot, damn.
Auntie running away with a shotgun!
If aliens were real,
then orphans would finally have a home.
An orphan walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Buddy, you have to go home." The orphan replies, "Where is home?"
What do you call a lesbian alien? A "lesbeening."
My wife left a note on the fridge. The note read, "It's not working." I don't know what she's talking about. I opened the fridge, and it worked fine!
What do you call a dino stripper?
A dinohore.
I bought a Dalek egg timer recently...
After a few minutes, it shouts, "Eggs terminate!"