Aed jokes
What do you get when you put a baby in a box filled with glass and nails and push it down the stairs?
... A boner.
My dad is Al-Qaeda, and he even took a plane trip to New York in 2001.
If I were in a staring contest with you, I would be looking at a rainbow.
What to say to a single guy who's insulting you: "Shut up, you horny virgin!"
Man, don't you hate it when you hit a speed bump by an orphanage but then realize there's no speed bumps here...
Yo mama is so fat when she sees a bus full of white people, she thinks it's a Twinkie, lmao xd.
A Story:
I lived in a small house. Behind my house was a big forest. If I went in the forest, then I heard scary sounds. That was very dreadful. I had a son. He was 9 years old. One day he went into the forest and did not come back. I called the police, but it couldn't help. I went looking. I really wanted my son Robby back. I missed him so! With a flashlight and compass, I went into the dark, eerie forest. Then the noises came again, but this time I also heard a scream. A scream from a nine year old child. It was Robby, certainly! I stopped in front of a tunnel.
Sequel follows...
A man finds his son climbing the roof of his house. The kid kept using all sorts of material to climb up, but the dad didn't pay much attention.
Next day the kid went to the state tower and kept climbing using some adhesive gloves. The dad asks his son for a second time: "Son! Why are you doing this?" The son replies: "You told me to aim up high!"
How do rapists justify murdering a young innocent human being?
Same way as pro-aborts, by saying "My body, my choice!"
What is a kind thing to say to someone and what is a rude thing to say to someone?
Kind thing to say to someone: You are the most perfect you there is. Your outlook on life is amaz- (BLAH, BLAH, BLAH ENOUGH!)
Rudist thing to say too someone: You more uglyer than my mama's boyfriend. You are a son of a b word! Okay that is so much rude and why you can say that to a tree but anyway not the point. Bonus: The world's most weirdest name to say to a girl, is Nutter butter, we know that's a weird *and* stupid name because she is not nutter or butter she is a person not a thing! Oh well bye!!!!
How do you get chewing gum out of a child's hair? Cancer.
What's a popular name in China? Curiosity, because curiosity killed the cat.
How do you stop a rape victim from speaking out?
Marry her.
What do you call a convict in prison for touching little girls? A boy named Brandon.
Q: What were my son's last words before he died?
A: "Bye, Dad, I am going to school."
Where is the worst place to lock your keys in your car?
The anti-abortion clinic because you have to go back in and ask for a coat hanger.
What is a penguin without a pen? A guin...
A priest, a pedo, and a rapist walk into a bar and that's just the first guy.
What's the difference between Spongebob and a feminist?
A feminist has hair.
John saw a Gay in a wheelchair.
"I didn't know a man could be a fruit and a Vegetable!"