Aed jokes

Today on a drive, I decided to go visit my childhood home. I asked the people living there if I could come inside because I was feeling nostalgic, but they refused and slammed the door in my face.

My parents are the worst.

Osama Bin Laden, Josef Stalin, and Hitler are robbing a bank, who do the cops shoot first?

A black guy.

The worst comedians take 9 months to make a joke. Then they spend the rest of their lives trying to forget it.

I went to a birthday party and told dad jokes.

The jokes didn't go over well. I was asked to leave the orphanage.

I tell dad jokes all the time even though I’m not actually a dad.

I’m a faux pa.

What does a cannibal do after eating its vegetables?

Sells the wheelchair.

I would never slap a woman, then I’d be destroying property.

Q: Why are school shooting jokes funny?

A: Because they're intended for a young audience.

Two guys in a car get pulled over by a cop. The cop taps the window, and the window rolls down. "Good evening, gentlemen, we're looking for two pedophiles."

The guy quickly closes the window. Ten seconds later, he lowers it again and says, "Ok, we'll do it."

What do you call a shoe made by George Floyd?

The Breath Takers.

What is another word for a bagel? 🥯

Jewish doughnut ✡️ 🍩👏 👏 👍 👍 👌 👌 💪 💪 😋 🏆 🎖

What’s strong enough for a man, but made for a woman?

The back of my hand.

What does a race track and your hairline have in common? They both go up and down.

Yo mama is such a slut, she could get slapped by a pack of hot dogs and get pregnant.

When you find out your wife had a miscarriage,

So you start singing "It’s the best day ever!"

Your mum is so slow, it took her nine months to make a joke.

Why do white people own a lot of pets?

Because they're not allowed to own people anymore.

I had a JFK joke, but it went right through my head.

What do you call a fart in a gay bar?

A mating call.

How come pizza boxes are square when the pizza is a circle cut into triangles?