Aed jokes
Q. What do they call an ISIS terrorist who owns both a camel and a goat?
A. Bisexual.
I was playing laser tag with my ex, but I (wink) didn't realize I had a real gun.
Q: What do you call a Chinese billionaire?
A: Cha-Ching!
Why can't orphans walk through doors?
Because they don't have a house to walk into.
What is the most noise that comes out of a ladies mouth? Nothing because they never have anything important to say.
Q: Why are lesbians bad at math?
A: Because they can't multiply.
What do you call a person with a flip flop?
My dad.
What do u call a Muslim praying: Allahu akbar.
What's a terrorist's favorite car? A Porsche 9/11.
What's the difference between an emo and a banana?
They both hang like apples.
My late grandpa was always popular with women. One day, before he died, I asked him what his secret was. He said, "I inherited a watering hole."
Bewildered, I replied, "What does that have to do with anything?"
"I could easily get anyone wet because I was well endowed."
A guy tried to suffocate himself with his BMW exhaust, but his engine failed.
This is the first time German engineering fails to gas someone.
Fun Fact: Did you know JFK's brain was so big it covered a whole entire limousine?
My disabled friend rolled into a burning orphanage and saved lots of kids. When he came out, the kids tried to play with him because his wheels were on fire. They called him Hot Wheels.
Q: How tall was Hitler's grass? A: *Hitler salute* about this high!
I am whooping my doge's a$$. If you like, you can free him.
Doctor: I’m sorry, I can’t see you today.
Orphan: Oh, how about tomorrow?
Doctor: No, I can’t ever see you.
Orphan: Why?
Doctor: Because I’m a family physician.
Only a true MHA fan would understand.
Husband: “Honey, what’s the difference between a Ferrari and an erection?”
Wife: “ok... what is it?”
Husband: “I don’t have a Ferrari right now.”
What do a gay man and an ambulance have in common?
They both take it in the back and go “whoot whoot.”