Aed jokes
A man went to buy 5 undies, so he said, "Hi, 5 undies, please, 1 for each weekday." Then another man comes and said, "Hi, 7 undies please, 1 for each day, and they'll finish cleaning by Sunday." So the cashier said, "Now that's more like it!" And then another person said, "Hi, 12 undies please, wait, I'm gonna double check... January... fe"
We have a teacher in school. His name is Haybrock, but he is gay, so we call him Gaybrock.
You get on an elevator and you find the Pope and Donald Trump cowering from two snarling wolves. In your hand you find a revolver with only two bullets in it... what do you do?
You shoot the Pope and the Donald each in a leg and exit the elevator at the next stop.
A bicurious man goes to a gay bar.
A gay man offers him a drink.
The bi man explains he doesn't know if he's gay or not.
"That's fine," he says, "let's just have a drink."
The gay man asks him for a dance, and he explains again he isn't sure if he's gay or not.
Eventually, the gay man invites him to go home with him to hang out as friends.
They get to his house, and the gay man says, "Do you fancy having sex?"
He isn't sure, so the gay man explains, "I'll push in slow, and at any point you want to stop, make animal sounds, and if you like it, start singing."
So they get to it, and the gay man pushes in slowly, the bi man bursts out "MOOOOO MOOOOO MOOOOOOVVVEE CCLOSSEEERRRR"
What's the difference between Carrie Underwood and a robot?
A robot can feign empathy.
it's a fnac ref
I'm not racist, I have a colored TV.
What do u call a Muslim praying: Allahu akbar.
I have a nun joke! It is nun-ya business!!! Ha!!! Ha!!! Ha!!! Ha!!! 😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣
How do you affirm a trans woman's gender?
By kicking him hard in the balls.
What is the difference between a Mexican maid and a Jewish maid?
One of them won’t clean the oven.
What two fights can Africa never win?
A food fight and a water fight.
Why do animals in polar regions have thick fur? Because they don't have a barber! 🤣 🤣 🤣
What do trans men and Pinocchio have in common?
Both are lying when they say "I'm a real boy."
(I'm a trans man myself lol)
"What do you give a man that has everything? Penicillin."
I used to date a girl with a lazy eye. Turns out she was seeing someone else the whole time.
What do an acting role and playing sports have in common?
If you break a leg, you get cast.
What’s one good thing about child molesters? They drive slow in a school zone.
Why is Donald Trump like a creamsicle?
He's white on the inside.
He's orange on the outside.
And then there's that stick!
I got jealous when my phone dies.
Yesterday I went to a lightbulb party, and it was lit.