Aed jokes

When your legs forget how to work after leg day, I can't climb the stairs.

Michael Myers right behind me. Runs like I'm a track star!

What do Michael Jackson and an Xbox have in common?

They both get turned on by kids.

I don't wanna brag, but I finished a puzzle in under a week, and it said 2-4 years on the box.

What's the difference between Obama and Trump?

Obama was a president and Trump was a whiny bitch!

As a lifelong farmer, I was excited that Ligue 1 was moving up the UEFA ranking toward an Industrial Revolution and I can finally leave the farm. Alas, Pessi joined and we went down a rank because he is so finished. Shame on you Pessi, now I have to go back to shoveling cow shit.

Yo mama is so stupid, she took her dog to the vet because she thought he had a tube of lipstick stuck between his legs.

Random guy: Hi, how old are you?

Me: 15

The guy: You're so young, age is just a number.

Me: Do you know what else is a number?

The guy: What?

Me: 911

My friend: You're so skinny, you never miss the elevator when it's closing. You just slip right through!😂

Me thinking it's a gift from God: 🕴️😎

I got caught fucking a dead body by my family. RIP grandma.

I have a confession. I used to be a Christian.

Don’t bother me none, babe!

Awesome! I much prefer being a Christine!

“Hol up”

You're so poor, when a robber robs your house, they feel bad for you and just leave.

This kid yelled "Jenga" when we were watching a 9/11 documentary.

My friend in a wheelchair tells a funny joke.

I resist the urge to say that he should become a stand-up comedian.

I threw a boomerang years ago. Now I live in constant fear.

My dog went through my bathroom garbage, and for some reason, my sister put a bunch of ketchup packets in there...

A chef named his chicken Richard and named a rooster Ballz. A guy walks up and asks the chef what he's cooking. He replies, "My dick and balls."

Why don't a gun and an orphan have anything in common? The gun is actually useful.

What do an orphan and a blind person have in common? They both can't see their parents.

Guys, we gotta stop telling these jokes. They are getting out of h- oh wait no .... Continue.

Yo daddy so stupid, he threw a Father’s Day party at the orphanage.

What did the Catholic priest say to the other Catholic priest as they entered the orphanage? Let’s us prey.

What do you call a dick that doesn't fit in an asshole?

A misfit.