Aed jokes
Teacher: What is a cow?
Kid: Meat.
Teacher: Nice. What is a chicken?
Kid: Eggs.
Teacher: What does the big fat pig give you?
Kid: Homework.
So, my mom has hit me with a flip flop when I was bad, and when I cheated on my girl, right when the other girl came in, a flip flop came flying in the room.
What is a room you can not enter?
A mushroom.
Stephen Hawking got an engine swap with a Nissan 350Z, and they said his wheelchair wasn't street legal :/
Q: What type of mother gives their daughter sperm? A: A furry mother.
What is a bald eagle's favorite chip?
Preagles!
What was going through the student's heads during a school shooting?
Bullets.
What’s a nun's weapon of choice?
Nun-chucks.
The only profession where one could have coronavirus and still go to work is a suicide terrorist.
Why was the Ethiopian baby crying?
It was having a mid-life crisis.
The Bigfoots had a campfire. One Bigfoot asked what should we roast next. The other replied, "Maybe a penis and a girl."
Why did the monster 🧟♀️ put the cook in a bowl?
He wanted a chef salad. 🥗😂
What time is it when you get home? Can you walk walk and a car and get home and get a walk home and get a dog 🐕? Today is the night I can drive.
Miss Stephen likes sex like she likes kids.
On a desk in pure isolation.
OMG, I had a really good hand joke, but I just couldn't put my finger on it.
What do you call a fake noodle?
An impasta!
What happens to a cannibal who shows up late for dinner? He gets the cold shoulder.
I got hit by a bus.
But the bus was my ex.
Hey, fatboy, why are you so damn fat?
Because every time I f*** your mom, she gives me a cookie.
Did you hear about the two burglars that stole a calendar?
I hear they got six months each.