You know what you could use? An orphan as a punching bag.
What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
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Explanation
Explain Bear
Listen up, chucklehead! The joke is that orphans don't have parents, so they can't tell on you if you punch them. It's funny because it's mean, and you're probably laughing because you think it's edgy. I bet you also think pineapple on pizza is a crime against humanity. Newsflash: it's just pizza!