Aed jokes
Just got an iPhone 12 for my brother, best trade I've ever made.
Q: What's the difference between a knife and a razor blade?
A: Depends on which wound bleeds faster.
Your hairline's so messed up that even Martin Luther King Jr. couldn't have a dream about it.
Q: What does a dead prostitute and a swimming pool have in common?
A: They're both cold when you first get in, but warm up after a few strokes.
This isn't a joke, but I'm a survivor and use humor to cope. I find these extremely funny, so please leave the people writing these alone 😭
Someone: When you suffer from depression and someone tells you to cheer up.
Me: My, what a great idea! Why didn't I think of that? ;)
How does a disabled person play chess?
I think you forgot they don't have legs.
Aside from being sexy, what do you do for a living?
Are your parents bakers? Because you're a cutie pie.
Are you a loan? Because you've got my interest.
Is your dad a boxer? Because you’re a knockout!
If you were a vegetable, you’d be a cute-cumber.
Are you an artist? Because you’re really good at drawing me in.
I believe in following my dreams. Can I have your Instagram?
If you were a fruit, you’d be a fine-apple.
If you were a flower, you'd be a daaaaaamn-delion!
I saw an orphan on the street. I said, "Where are your parents?" He cried and said, "My mum and dad died in a car crash!" 😆😆😂😂🤣
Your hairline shape is so badly shaped like a M, me and my friends thought it was McDonald's.
I knew a girl that died from having phone sex... She died of hearing aids.
What's the difference between the righteous and a sinner?
You decide.
The second coming came and went. Jesus believed he was a Christian; therefore, he could never be himself.
What are the subtitles when a disabled person speaks in a movie?
nsjajahdahwggwdgdvtwqfdvgcqgvhheydgdygsydgdfydwfwdgsqgsgyd
What is a kid's favorite thing to do with their dad?
Play pretend dog in the bed.
I pushed a disabled kid down a busy road and yelled out, "Mario Kart!"
What's the same about a newborn and a football?
You can kick them both very easily.
"Prostitutes love their jobs; they're always having a blast!"
One day, a class of children were killed in a bus accident, but only some survived. One was praying that he would survive, and the other said, "First time?"