Aed jokes

For a present on Christmas, I gave an orphan a phone, just without a home button.

Your hairline is so back it's not even a hairline cuz you're bald. LOL

You know some of these jokes took me 9 minutes and 11 seconds to realize. When I did, it hit me like a plane.

Dad: If you study, then I will buy you a new iPhone.

Son: Okay, I'll do it!

5 hours later...

Son: I'm done!

Dad: I lied.

Son: So did I!

What does Sonic wear when he goes to the beach? A speedo.

I would make a joke about Silver the Hedgehog... but it's no use!

"Suicide bomber kills 44 people in Pakistan mosque." Damn, that's a crazy K/D. He must be hacking.

What do you call Hitler when he gets thrown?

A gas grenade.

What do you do when a Panera Bread panera breads?

Panera Bread.

A man went to buy 5 undies, so he said, "Hi, 5 undies, please, 1 for each weekday." Then another man comes and said, "Hi, 7 undies please, 1 for each day, and they'll finish cleaning by Sunday." So the cashier said, "Now that's more like it!" And then another person said, "Hi, 12 undies please, wait, I'm gonna double check... January... fe"

What do you call an orphan's family reunion?

Me time.

Why did the chicken cross the road? cuz he saw a chic 😉

Yo ass built like a wide body Hellcat!

Random person: "What's one thing your ex gave you that you can't get rid of?"

Man: *Shows a picture of his child.*

Why did the Scarecrow get a promotion?

Because it was OUTSTANDING in the field! 💀💀😂😂😂😂😂

A special quote: “I was gonna slap that girl into tomorrow!”

A special quote: “No, Mackenzie! You're the savage beast!”

I stole a wheelchair. I knew the owner would come crawling back.

Why can't the Ctrl key cross the road? Because it is an 8-lane highway.

What did a tree say to the tomato?

Nothing! Trees don't talk, silly.