Aed jokes
How was copper wire invented?
Two Jewish people fighting over a penny.
Did you hear about the woman who put her husband’s ashes in a burrito?
He gets to tear that ass up one more time.
How is a priest like a wristwatch?
They both start at 12.
House parties are like churches: there's always an underage kid getting fucked somewhere.
Why did the rapper wear a watch to the studio?
Because it was all about the TIMING.
What do you call an Eskimo stripper?
A frosty-tute.
What do you call a prostitute in a wheelchair?
Hot wheels.
How many emo kids does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, they just like hanging in the dark.
What do you call a bunch of Black people in the river?
A black current...
A gay couple and a lesbian couple are going on a cruise. Who gets there first?
Obviously, the lesbian couple; they got their lickety-split. The gay couple was still packing their shit.
What do the initials CIA stand for?
Central Intelligence of A**holes.
What’s the difference between a Jew and an American? The American makes it out of camp.
My son was thrown out of school for letting a schoolgirl wank him off.
"That's the third school this year..." I said to my son, "... Maybe teaching isn't for you."
Why does 9/11 only get a day, but Pride gets an entire month?
Because pride is a bigger tragedy.
What do you call a gay pride parade that was ran over?
Rainbow road.
What’s a rapper’s favorite EXERCISE?
Flexin’.
What do you call lesbian sex during their period?
A blood transfusion.
What's the difference between a gay man and a freezer?
A freezer doesn't scream when you put meat inside it.
Why is bungee jumping similar to a condom?
Because if the rubber snaps, you're fucked.
What’s a fun game to play during a pride parade?
Capture the flag.