You're an alcoholic!
Addiction Jokes
Why didn't the child go to school?
Because he died of a heroin overdose.
Don't give emos crack, they're high enough.
Why is pounding your mom like playing video games?
Because once you start, you just can’t stop until you win!
Wow, he stole my antidepressant toy. The next day, he was on the ground.
A man walks into an AA meeting and asks for a roadmap.
This is how I got [redacted]
We recently found out my grandpa is addicted to Viagra.
No one is taking it harder than grandpa.
You look like a heroin addict in a women's refuge.
I tried to rape Amy Winehouse, but she said, "No! No! No!"
What was David Bowie’s last hit?
Probably heroin.
you.
I'm a recovering cake addict.
Pussy = drugs.
What did Eminem do when he couldn't get some of his mom's spaghetti?
Well, he didn't make it back to recovery this time...
My dad: You better wear flip-flops everywhere.
Suicidal son: Goes to crack alley.
Me and my wife decided we would only smoke after sex.
I'm still on the first pack. She's up to 2 packs a week.
Congratulations to Avicii for passing his 3-day milestone of sobriety!
What did rapper Pop Smoke get high off of? Cigarettes with Pop and Smoke.
Why did the Duck go to rehab?
Because he was a Quackhead.