Substance jokes

If sugar is a drug, does that mean putting it in coffee is overdose?

What is white and sticky?

Glue.

Where are crackheads from?

OHIGHo

Yo mama so short that when she tried to sniff meth, she couldn’t get high.

What's the difference between a hooker and a drug dealer?

The hooker can wash out her crack and reuse it.

If a midget does meth, does he get high or get medium?

Today, I saw my friend go crazy eating her ham sandwich. When she went to the bathroom, I checked inside her ham sandwich, and there were fresh drugs.

What do you call an acid with a bad attitude?

A-Mean-O-Acid.

What is a duck's favorite thing to smoke?

Quack.

Yo mama so short, when she tried sniffing cocaine, she couldn’t get high.

What’s the difference between the milk and drugs?

My dad brought the drugs back, not the milk though! 😭

What do you call a duck on drugs?

A quackhead.

What's the best way to remove gum from hair?

Cancer.

Jack and Jill went up a hill to smoke some marijuana. Jack got high and touched her thigh and said, "Do you wanna?" Jill said yes and pulled up her dress and they had some fun.

But silly Jill forgot her pills, and so they had a son.

Mommy, mommy! Are we drug dealers?

Shut up and cut the coke.

Why did Amy Winehouse snort Splenda?

She thought it was Diet Coke.

What's the difference between a hooker and a drug dealer?

A hooker can wash her crack, then sell it again.

I had something about tripping over ice.

Well, it slipped my mind, so I'll just test some diamonds to see if they're ice.

Ni tshike mbangi bcz ani zaha toilet, nikarhi Ni hlometela out side loko tiniba. Ni hlometela ndzeni ka poto.

I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with, but I have been tripping all day!