You jokes
You and your mom.
Charizarding.
When you light a girl's pubes on fire, put it out with your jizz, then flap your arms and say, "You don't have enough badges to train me!"
Why did Princess Diana cross the road?
She wasn’t wearing her seatbelt.
Did you know Princess Diana had dandruff? They found her head and shoulders all over the windshield.
How do you know when a cabbage is boiled?
The wheelchair floats to the top.
What do you call a Mexican without a car?
Carlos.
R.I.P. boiled water. You will be mist.
What did the cow say to the cheese? I am your father.
What do you call a cow that's laying down? Ground Beef.
A man enters the bank and says, "Hi, I'm robbing you!" The man was arrested instantly.
If you cut off your head, you can't breathe.
You also can't breathe if you die.
So why isn't it debreathiation?
I see that you start work at 9am, but your hairline starts at 9:15am.
What did the toaster say to the toast?
"I want you inside me."
What do you get when you cross an alligator with a vest?
An investigator.
Wife: Stop telling rape jokes, it's not funny. Husband: Who raped you this morning?
What makes a skeleton laugh?
When you tickle his funny bone with a skele-TON of jokes!
Heh.
Why don't you see gay people in wheelchairs?
Because once you're a fruit, you can't be a vegetable.
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?
Make him clap until his parents come back.
If you tell me to get a life, you're telling me to get a life better than yours!
What do you call an abo with a shotgun?
Sir.
You think my face is ugly? Yours is more.
How do you call a black pilot?
A pilot, you racist.