You jokes

What do you call a bad "egg" meme?

Deep fried!

What do you call a deer with no eyes? No eyed deer.

What do u call a deer with no eyes or legs? Still no eyed deer.

What do u call a deer with no eyes, no legs and no balls? Still no f*#$in eyed deer.

Note to all.

My name is Lariah. Lariah Carla Brown, 14 years old and I am 1 of triplets. I don't understand how rape jokes are funny, and I just want to make that statement clear. I also hate orphan jokes because I WAS one. Notice when I put WAS! I also see jokes about cancer, now I know you can't be kidding. You know that cancer is a disease that many people get and could die from, so you are just wrong about that!

Teacher: *calls you up to the board*. You: Ok. *Gets intense boner* *has to fart really bad* You: F***!!!!!!!

What do you call a cross between a priest and a child?

The cross shoved up the priest’s ass as he ‘downward dogs’ the kid.

Why did Michael Jackson name his kid Blanket?

What would you call a cover for your cock?

Day 70 without sex, my doctor asked me, "Are you sexually active?" I said, "Why, what you tryna do?"

Spell "I C U P." I see you pee.

Dear doctor,

I've heard it's a good sign when women scream your first name during sex, but recently women have been screaming my full name. It's weird, I feel like I'm famous. Can you tell me what this means?

Yours Truly, Ray Palp

You're an orphan and blind. You have cancer. You will die in 3 days. Merry Xmas!

Your hairline is so bad when I looked at you, I had to use accessibility.

Light travels faster than sound, which is why you seemed bright until you spoke.

How emos propose: Would you please join my family tree?

Emos are weird to me because they dress up all black, and you know I don't like that, so that's why I don't like it.

How do you put a baby alien to sleep?

You rocket. 🚀🚀🚀

You wanna hear a joke?

Two Emos hanging out under a tree.

How many Emos does it take to commit suicide? Way too fucking many, because they never get it right the first time!

"Fatherless jokes aren't funny, you know."

What do you call onions and beans?

Tear gas.

Hi, my name isn't Pi.

Look up at the sky and wonder why.

Why are you alive?

To all the children on this website, hello!!!!! Hey!!!! How is life treating you?

(BTW I'm a kid, too. I'm Hayley, and I'm turning 13. My B-day is 10/08/2008.)