You jokes
What's the difference between a dog and a foster child?
A dog doesn't run to the police after you beat it.
"Oh, hey guys, do you know I saw a guy with dementia?"
"Oh, hey guys, do you know I saw a guy with dementia?"
"Oh, hey, do you know I saw a guy with dementia?"
Mom, what happens if you swear at a church?
Well, honey, a tee posing nun with glowing red eyes and nunchucks will beat you.
Friend: You are joking.
Me: Joking on deez nuts.
What do you call a child predator and an illegal immigrant? Alien vs. Predator.
You're so poor, when a robber robs your house, they feel bad for you and just leave.
What do you call a triggered white kid?
A school shooter!
Random guy: Hi, how old are you?
Me: 15
The guy: You're so young, age is just a number.
Me: Do you know what else is a number?
The guy: What?
Me: 911
My friend: You're so skinny, you never miss the elevator when it's closing. You just slip right through!😂
Me thinking it's a gift from God: 🕴️😎
As a lifelong farmer, I was excited that Ligue 1 was moving up the UEFA ranking toward an Industrial Revolution and I can finally leave the farm. Alas, Pessi joined and we went down a rank because he is so finished. Shame on you Pessi, now I have to go back to shoveling cow shit.
What do you call a lying Mexican?
Pinocchico.
What do you call a kid that's in the fire? Hot Wheels.
What does a polite mouse say?
"Cheese and thank you."
What do you call a two-legged cow? Lean beef.
These days, dating life is hard. You put yourself out there, and it's hard to find someone. The only thing to do is turn to family.
What do you call a dick that doesn't fit in an asshole?
A misfit.
Your mom went to the ocean, and the whales said, "We are family," even though you are fatter than me.
Iran: We can beat the USA.
Japan: You do realize we beat him in Battleship, and he dropped the sun on us.
Iran: So?
Japan: Twice!
Hey guys, thank you for finding this. Vote in the thumbs up or thumbs down whether you prefer Reese’s cups or Starbursts, and comment if you have a different preference! I would like to know a little about people! Thanks, Izzy.
What do you call your mom? Gay.