You jokes

What do you call a fat man that has a stomach shaped like an egg?

Humpty Dumpty!

Your mom wants to tell you that you're adopted, but you were an orphan.

In China, just when you think you know everything... then boooom.

A gay chicken... hahaha.

Hey, you might want to look at your butt because there's something coming out of Uranus.

What's the difference between a high street betting firm and a prostitute?

You can get on with a prostitute!

Hi, how are you? Are you good?

Girl: Hey. Boy: Hi? Girl: I need to tell you something... Boy: WHAT? Girl: I like you. Boy: And I hate you. Boy: YOU'RE A CHICKEN 🐔🐔 🐔 Girl: I HATE YOU YOU POOP 💩💩💩💩 Girl: LOSER L Boy: I thought you said you liked me. Girl: SHUT UP CHICKEN/POOP 💩💩🐔 🐔 Boy: GIRL BYE Girl: Bye Felicia.

What do you call your sister who only has one leg?

Ei-lean.

Have you heard about the awesome fruit race?

The lettuce was ahead, but the tomato was able to ketchup!

What do you call a rude cow?

Beef jerky.

Lady: Will you fuck me?

Man: No, I don’t have a penis.

Lady pulls down man's pants and looks in them. "Yes, you do!" she says.

Man: Oh, I forgot it was there.

If you ever get mad, just punch an orphan. What are they supposed to do? Tell their parents?

What do you call a white girl that can run faster than her brothers? A redneck virgin.

What did my dad say before he went to go get milk?

"There's money in my wallet for pizza. I love you."

Why are you censoring my friend Franz? He's just making jokes, but you admins get offended too easily, f*cktards!

What do you call your sister if she only has one leg?

Ei-lean.

What's the difference between a gun and chips? When you bring it to class, everyone starts wanting to be your friend.

Your forehead [is] so big [that] every time you shout, your forehead starts pulsing.

You know the stupid trend where people say it’s ok to be overly obese? Healthy even? That you should take pride in it? Which idiots started that movement?

Well. We know one thing for sure. They were obviously members of a wider community.

A kid asks his mom what dark humor is.

She says, “You see that man with no arms, tell him to clap.”

“But mom, I’m blind!” says the kid.

“Exactly,” replied the mom.