You jokes
A student asked a teacher, "How do you pronounce this word? It's spelled A-L-L-I-E-D."
The teacher was about to answer, but then the student said, "Actually, I know how to pronounce it. I lied!" (allied)
Kid: Imagine being an orphan!
Parents: Look who's talking, not you 'cause you ain't got no one to talk to! *vanishes*
Kid: WAIT, WHAT!
Sometimes I look at someone I hate and think, "I hope you get laid tonight."
By a tweaker with AIDS.
Where do you find an orphan? Just look for your mum.
Jordan, you stupid ass! Addison never bothered you so leave her the FUCK alone! How about this? Get up, go outside, stop being a jackass, and get a fucking life!
Girl: "When we get married, I want to share all your worries, troubles, and lighten your burden."
Boy: "It's very kind of you, darling, but I don't have any worries or troubles."
Girl: "Well, that's because we aren't married yet!"
Did you know curing boredom is quite simple?
For instance, you could pretend to be an apple by tying a rope around your neck for a stem.
"Orange you glad I made it?"
(Kids Doing A Science Project.) Kid 1: Did you bring Uranus?
Kid 2: Never leave home without it.
What do you call a very rude bird? A mockingbird.
How can you tell that a blonde likes you? She only gives three fucking nights in a row.
What do you call a burned Mexican? A fried torteya.
Your uncle Jack is stuck on a horse.
Would you help your uncle "Jack" off the horse?
Bianca: Mr. Doeken, even though I completed my test, you still said it was "late." Why is that?
Mr. Dowon: Bianca, for the LAST TIME, MY LAST NAME IS DOWON!
Bianca (🤨): Are you sure?
Mr. Dowon (😒): What do you need, Bianca?
Bianca: It's Bianca!
Mr. Dowon: Are you sure?
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
I did app.
I did app who?
You did a poo.
A flock of swallows were migrating south as a jet flew past them.
"Why was that one flying so fast?" asked one. Another answers, "Can't you see his tail is burning?"
Have you heard about kids with AIDS?
It never gets old.
I wanna tell you a scary math joke, but I'm too squared to tell you.
So put your best face on everybody, pretend you know this song everybody.
*pulls out noose* "COME HANG!"
*pulls out gun* Let's go out with a bang... Bang- *gunshot*
What do you call a bird with no wings?
Moas didn't even know that existed!