You jokes

Yo, hairline go so far back that your dad found it before you did.

I can't believe this!

Pizza is round and it comes in a square box, and you cut it into a triangle.

Plastic bags look like you, dirty and fake.

Yo mama's so poor that when I was walking down the street, I saw her kicking the trash can, and I asked, "What are you doing?" She said, "I'm moving!"

Friend: Hi!

Me: Who are you?

Friend: ...your friend?

Me: What are you talking about? The doctor already said I couldn’t have any.

If you are a girl and your favorite movie as a kid was Mulan, they successfully made a man out of you.

How many people fit in a tree?

I don't know, you tell me.

Do you play COC?

Because it’s a pretty good game.

Wow, you did 10 chin-ups? Was it 1 for each chin?

If you text your crush and they leave you on read, just know that "read" has four letters. You know what also has four letters? "Mine." So that basically means that you are theirs. :)

On a scale from 1 to America, how free are you this weekend?

Sister: You're so stupid.

Me: Calling me stupid doesn't make you any smarter!

What do you call a gay person on fire?

LGBBQ

What do you call a paraplegic cannibal?

"Dine and dash."

What do you call a teddy bear that fooled you?

Stuffed.

Were you born on a highway? Because that's where most accidents happen.

Me: Breathe right now if you wanna date me.

"Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Knock, knock, knock, knock, knock." "Who?" "Knock, knock you."

What do you call a cute door? A-door-able!

How do you anger a Libertarian?

Don't tell him the truth.