You jokes
Jim was caught beating a man up. Brooklyn took a picture of his license plate with her phone and told him, "Your life is ruined!" So Jim took a picture of her, and the next thing you know, he said, "Now my phone is ruined!"
Why is basketball called basketball?
Because you play with a basket.
I'll never forget my grampa's last words, "Stop shaking the ladder, you cunt!"
Q: What do you call an emo business? A: A cutting board.
Doctor: You should stop masturbating.
Me: Doc, I'm almost done.
Reasons
How do you call an autistic kid with a pistol?
Special forces.
Yo... Kobe, you're going down man. Did you forget the low grade fuel?
It is a known fact that you cannot say “harassment” without “her ass.”
I guess you could say, “harassment something.”
"When someone asks for a dad joke and you send them to the orphan page."
Did you know that chips taste like the baked potato in things called bags of chips?
A man is depressed and he sighs. A bully says, "Stop sighing, you sound like some guys having a threesome!"
How do you ride two bikes at once?
You ride them in tandem!
Saying a Kobe joke after he died tends to ignite a fire in the people you say it to.
Bro, are you an Oompa Loompa? Because you look like you just came from the chocolate factory.
Milk makes you tall, right?
Well how did you get tall if your dad didn't come back with the milk?
What do you call a deer with no eyes?
No idea.
Bonus joke: What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs?
Still no idea.
There are only women's rights causes because they leave you.
Why don't you take emo skydiving?
They cut the rope.
A small boy went up to a dog fountain? The more you. HAHA gorgeous ddollars of benjamin frnakus wghen hes wearing beakini bea at the beach hahaha.
What do you call a fake noodle?
An im-pasta.