You jokes
What do you call a blonde in the freezer?
Her parents named her Jessica, so we should probably continue to call her that. She was supposed to graduate tomorrow.
Your mom and your dad.
If at first you don’t succeed... then skydiving definitely isn’t for you.
I saw a kid sitting on the curb and I asked him, "Are you an orphan?"
He said, "Yeah, what gave me away?" "You're parents did."
I robbed a person in a wheelchair. He cried and said: "You can run, but you can't hide." I ran, and I never saw him again.
Are you a building?
Cuz I rate you 9/11.
How do you get a fat kid to lose weight?
You pay the ice cream man to keep driving.
What do you call a dwarf skating on ice?
A midget spinner.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, Oh, you wanna die? I wanna die too!
What do you call a three humped camel?
"Knock, knock."
"Who's there?"
"Who."
"Who who?"
"Why are you who-ing like an owl?"
"Do you know the difference between wallpaper and toilet paper?" Replies, "No." "Gross!"
What do you call a crippled man? Alex keating hahahahahahahahahahahh!
Your friend lost his left arm, and after getting out of the hospital, you ask him if he’s OK. He says, "Yeah, I’m all RIGHT."
What do you call Darth Vader when he dies?
A black alien.
Okay, what do you call a dummy that writes a dumb writer?
You know how divers jump off a cliff and land in the water well...
Emos do that too, but when they jump, they don't land in the water.
Q: What do you call a gang of emos?
A: Suicide Squad.
What do you call a blind photographer? A waste of money.
How is an emo kid’s wrist like Pink Floyd?
It’s all shitty until you reach the final cut.