You jokes
What do you call a blonde in the freezer?
Her parents named her Jessica, so we should probably continue to call her that. She was supposed to graduate tomorrow.
*at school*
Nobody: Do you want nuts?
Me: Wait, you have some?
Nobody: Yeah, they're my own.
Me: :0
You're so fat, when you step on a scale it says, "To be continued."
If at first you don’t succeed... then skydiving definitely isn’t for you.
I saw a kid sitting on the curb and I asked him, "Are you an orphan?"
He said, "Yeah, what gave me away?" "You're parents did."
Memes
"Knock, knock."
"Who's there?"
"Who."
"Who who?"
"Why are you who-ing like an owl?"
I robbed a person in a wheelchair. He cried and said: "You can run, but you can't hide." I ran, and I never saw him again.
What do you call a crippled man? Alex keating hahahahahahahahahahahh!
Are you a building?
Cuz I rate you 9/11.
How do you get a fat kid to lose weight?
You pay the ice cream man to keep driving.
What do you get when you mix a 737 and 767?
A 797.
You know how there were like... two towers. I had so much fun playing Jenga in those planes! I WON!!!!!
ATTENTION EVERYBODY: I am the owner of this website, and I will be deleting it in 5 hours. Thank you everybody who has participated in this website's life. Goodbye!
What do you call a stoned Mexican?
Baked bean.
They say during sex you burn off as many calories as running 8 miles. Who the fuck runs 8 miles in 30 seconds?
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground meat.
Your friend lost his left arm, and after getting out of the hospital, you ask him if he’s OK. He says, "Yeah, I’m all RIGHT."
What do you call Darth Vader when he dies?
A black alien.
You know who else suffers from Alzheimer's...
You know who else suffers from Alzheimer's.
What did one tower say to the other? "Damn, you looking fly!"