What do you call a low budget terrorist attack?
7/11
You Jokes
How do you know all suicide bombers self-identify as being old?
They are all boomers in the end.
Daddy, I really miss you. Mummy changed my name to Tickle Timpson. Anyway, daddy I forgive you for abusing me.
Like if you think someone is gay.
What’s the difference between a mosquito and a blonde?
One stops sucking when you slap it.
What do you call a gay BBQ? LGBBQ.
I heard that the numbers on the front of your credit card represent the number of minutes until you meet the 💕 love of your life!💕
And the 3 numbers on the back represent the month and day you make it official!!
Comment those numbers to lock it in!!😄
What do you call a deer with hooves in his ears?
Anything you want—he can’t hear you.
What do you call a Taliban in a bath bomb?
What is soccer like when you lose your soccer ball?
Orphan: "My Parents."
So you know there's like dog mixes, right? Like a Snoodle and that stuff, right? So why can't a bulldog and a shih tzu be mixed? 'Cause if they did, it would be called bullshit.
I saw a kid wearing tatty rags on a curb, so I asked, "Are you an orphan?"
"Yes," he replied. "What gave me away?" He asked, "Your parents," I said.
What did the banana say to the vibrator?
"Why are you shaking? She’s gonna eat me!"
Son: Dad, what's a morbid joke?
Father: Walk over to a homeless man and throw a rock at him, then you will know.
Son: But Dad, I don't have arms or legs.
Father: Now you know.
Have you seen the inside of Ford's Theatre? It will blow your mind. ~Abraham Lincoln
If you think long and hard, oral sex is like cannibals.
When you look in the mirror, the mirror cracks.
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?
Make them clap until their parents come back.
What do you call a dinosaur with a butt?
A Butt-asaurus.
What do you call a flat-chested depressed person?
A cutting board.
