You jokes
Person: You suck!
Me: Tell that to your mom, and she’ll say the same thing, honey. 😎
What do you call a fish without an eye?
Fsh!
Did you hear about the man that got fired from his can job? It was soda-pressing.
Did you hear about the Boston marathon? 'Cause, well, I heard it was a blast and that it blew everyone away!
Are you a mirror, because I see myself in you?
What do you call a laughing motorcycle?
A Yamahahahaha!
Why can’t you tell a funny joke to a wheelchair kid? Because he just rolls with the joke.
What do you say when you wake up to the police trying to arrest you?
“C'mon, did ya really think I’d resist arrest?”
What does the man cheeseburger say to the girl cheeseburger?
“You got nice buns!”
What did the teacher say to the fat Turkish kid that always ate in his class?
"You could do with Ramadan lasting all year, couldn't you?"
What's the difference between a road bump and children crossing the road?
A road bump will make you slow down when you drive over it.
Hi 👋 I love you!
I did a walk today and I had to walk home from school and walk walk home from school and walk walk home from home and walk walk home and I had a good time with you and walk home from home and walk walk home and I had to.
I love you, Explain Bear. Please bear my children.
What do you call a pile of cats? A meowtain.
What do you call a pile of cheese? A cheese grater.
You are so intelligent that parents come running to beg you to be their child!
Are you a sports car? Because you give my heart quite a rush!
Wanna go to suicide school, then time travel to Hitler's bunker and ask him to teach you?
Islamic pubs and bars are the worst.
You can't drink alcohol or dance.
Women can get stoned though, no questions asked.
What do you call two homeless people throwing rocks at each other?
A pillow fight.