You jokes

You are the reason why child abortion still exists in the world.

Did you know every market in Africa is a black market?

What do you call a surprised Chinese man?

Answer: Ho Lee Fuk.

A poor person came up to me and said, "You're ugly." I said, "You remind me of Spider-Man: No Way Home."

Did you know that the letter "f" in "orphan" stands for family?

What do you call an autistic kid with a gun?

Special forces.

So this dude comes home from work one day, and his wife is watching the Food Network.

The husband asks, "Why do you watch that? You still can't cook," and the wife responds, "Why do you watch porn? You still can't f*ck."

Somebody: Do you even eat and get sleep?

Me: I have depression, what do you think?!

What do you call a basketball player with erectile dysfunction?

Tragic Johnson.

What do you call a Lesbian at a Barbecue? A LGBBQ.

Are you feeling down? Because I’d happily feel you up.

You need a good place to think? You can sit on my lap, and we’ll see the first thing that pops up!

If someone licks your elbow, you won't feel it.

If you put your ear up to someone's leg, you can hear them say, "WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?!"

What do you call a gay pride parade that was ran over?

Rainbow road.

My son caught me masturbating the other day and was like, "Dad, what are you doing?" I said, "Don't worry, you'll be doing it soon." He said, "Why is that?" I told him, "My arm is getting tired."

How do you get a dog to stop humping your leg?

Pick it up and suck its dick.

I'm not calling you a slut, I'm calling you a penny: two-faced, worthless, and in everyone's pants.

Did you hear about that Muslim party?

It was a blast!

Have you been to that paraplegic strip club? It's crawling with pussy!

If being sexy were a crime, you better lock me up.

Not because I'm sexy, but because I have 5 dead children in my basement.