You jokes

Dinner

What’s one thing you can say during family dinner and in bed?

"Will there be seconds?"

Health

How do you know when a fat person stops eating? You read about it in the obituary.

Memes

Boat

I could never fall out of a boat because I've already fallen for you.

Shooter

Hey, I just want to give a round of applause to Shooter McFly, single-handedly keeping the jokes section alive. Unappreciated, well, Shooter, one person here appreciates you, at least.

Plane Ticket

If you give a man a plane ticket, he will fly for a couple of hours, but if you push a man out of a plane, he will fly for the rest of his life :)

Poem

My girlfriend's sister told me to write her a poem. This is what I came up with:

roses are red, violets are blue, if you ever feel alone, I'm always watching you.

Guy

Why can’t you take a Black Asian guy golfing? Because he can’t drive and can’t find his own balls.

Squirt

What is the worst part about making an Asian girl squirt?

She charges you for extra sauce!

Olympics

How can you be fast and slow at the same time, getting a gold medal in the Special Olympics?

Babysitting

Dating 101:

Here's what you do:

1. Dinner. 2. Kiss. 3. Movie. 4. Sex. 5. Bring her back home. 6. Get paid 15 bucks for babysitting.

Sniper

How do you know someone from India is a good sniper?

They have a dot in the middle of the head.