You jokes
What do you call a guy at your doorstep with no arms or legs? Matt.
Me: "The villain has a point, you know."
Everyone else watching the WW2 documentary:
Bobby had 54 dicks (54).
He took 33 pills a month (5433).
Once he ran out of pills, he was left with 45 dicks (543345).
(Flip the calculator once you got the full number. 543345! He's got a lot!
What do you call a white bucket?
A pail.
Are you a ghost train? Because I am going to scream when I ride you.
Why are people disappointments? Because you are reading this.
In Denver, the members of a Sunday-school class were asked to set down their favorite biblical truths.
One youngster laboriously printed: “Do one to others as others do one to you.” —Lee Olson, The Denver Post
Did you hear about that musical that was sung by some obsidian?
It rocked!
Why do you think after death the angel says do not be afraid?
Search up biblically accurate angels.
How do you kill Hellen Keller?
Take her on a walk off a cliff.
To whoever stole my antidepressants, why do you need them?
You can say he is not your type until you realize your type is not typing.
What do you call a student in space?
An astrodent.
What do you call a Fuhrer who's also a fitness coach?
Adolf Fit-ler.
If somebody gives you lemons, cut them in half and do the juice in his eyes.
Orphans are pretty tough. I mean, you never see them running home...
Did you hear about the guy who dipped his balls in glitter? Pretty nuts!
What do you call a kid with an eyepatch and no arms or legs? Names.
If I was an object in this world, I’d be a glass! Because if you leave me when I’m too close to the edge, I will likely shatter and break.
Two balls sit inside a bucket. One turned to another and said, "Hey man, boing, are you sentient, too?"
The other one said, "I’m sapient, you are sentient!"
BOINGZINGA!?!