You jokes
What do you call a skeleton in the snow? A numb skull.
Did you hear the one about the hills?
It was hillarious.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Your mom.
Fuck you you rwind my life.
I'd tell you a joke about pizza, but it's too cheesy.
Did you hear that the governor's mansion in Alabama burned down?
Almost took out the whole trailer park.
"Knife to meet you all!"
Teachers: Do you give your mother that attitude?
Orphan: ...
What do you call a dumb and mean crocodile?
A crookodile.
Leo: Mother, what is an idiot?
Mother: An idiot is someone that explains something in a long, boring way so that the person that the idiot is trying to explain to doesn't understand.
Mother: Do you understand?
Leo: No.
Do you know what the secret is to have a smoking, hot body as a senior citizen?
Cremation.
What do you call two lesbians in a closet? A liqueur cabinet.
What do you call intelligent people in America?
Tourists.
Prostitution. The only job that pays more if you suck.
Q. What's the difference between a CEO and a deer?
A. You don't normally fuck the deer after you've shot it.
What do you call a disabled gang member? A crip.
What do you call a group of emo people?
"The Suicide Squad."
Did you hear about the guy who lost his left arm and leg?
He's all right.
Have you heard about the dyslexic devil worshipper?
He sold his soul to Santa.
Why do you wrap a hamster in duct tape?
So it doesn’t explode when you’re fucking it.
Are you sure your father isn't a thief?
Because he stole the stars from the sky and put them in your eyes.