You jokes
What do you call a white man having intercourse with a black woman?
An Oreo.
What do you call a pool full of handicapped people?
Vegetable soup.
Three nuns died in a car crash. They went up to heaven at the pearly gates. The gatekeeper said, "This really should not have happened, so I am going to send you back to earth as different people. Tell me who you want to be or look like." The first nun said, "I want to look like Madonna." Puff, you look like her now, but you can’t use her name. And sent her down to earth. The second one said, "I want to look like Marilyn Monroe." He then makes her look like her and sends her down to earth. The third nun said, "I want to look like Sarah Pipalini." The gatekeeper says to her, "Sarah Pipalini, who is that?" She gives the gatekeeper a newspaper article. He reads it, shakes his head no, and says, "It’s not Sarah Pipalini, it's Sahara pipeline laid by 500 men."
Man: Can you be my girlfriend?
Woman: I'm lesbian, sorry.
Man: Oh, here's your rope.
Like if you meet someone emo.
Memes
Roses are red, Violets are blue, You a dumb a** b*tch, We all know it's true.
What do you call sex in the World Trade Center?
An inside job.
Yo mama so fat that when she walked past the TV, you missed 3 episodes of your favorite show.
What did the Arch bridge say to the Truss bridge?
"I Truss-ted you!"
To the man in the wheelchair who stole my camouflage jacket: you can hide, but you can’t run.
What’s the difference between a mosquito and a blonde girl?
One stops sucking when you smack it.
One day a computer said to another computer, "Why are you so dumb?"
The other computer replied, "Because I have low memory."
If you ever get bored, tell an orphan to take two days off their calendar. If they ask why, say, "Because you're missing Father's Day and Mother's Day."
Waitress: You wanna box for your leftovers?
Me: No, but I'll arm wrestle you for the bill.
Like if you wanna have sex.
What do you call a black person swimming?
Cursed Minecraft image.
What do you call an Indian with a wooden leg? Shit on a stick.
What do you call an Indian with two wooden legs? A waste of lumber.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, You slept with my cousin but I did too.
At least if you're fat you don't need to put as much bathwater in the bath.
How do you enter your house?
Through Bill Gates!