You jokes
Why do orphans like tigers? I don't know, you tell me.
Let's tell a secret about each other... I'll go first.
I
hate
you!
What do you call a series of ascending steps with eyes that follow you intently?
A starecase.
[God creating the parrot] OK, HOW ABOUT A TYE-DYE CHICKEN THAT SCREAMS ACTUAL WORDS AT YOU?
You shouldn't joke about 9/11. My grampa died on 9/11. He was the best pilot in all of Saudi Arabia.
What animal can't you trust with your homework?
A: A cheetah!
Dude: Hey dude guess who I am?
Viewers: Dora.
Trump: No, I am President Trump.
Viewers: Why are you wearing Dora’s clothes and backpack?
Trump: Today we are going to build a wall.
Viewers: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
What's the difference between a woman with a penis and a terrorist? You can negotiate with the terrorist.
What do you get when you cross A-Rod with Chris Brown?
Cheater, cheater, woman beater!
What do you call a group of emos?
The Suicide Squad.
What do you call a photo of an orphan?
A family photo.
What's the difference between a casino and a church?
You actually mean it when you pray at a casino.
What did Michael say to the boy in his room at sleepovers?
"You are not alone."
What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a refrigerator?
A refrigerator doesn't toot when you put meat in it.
Someone was bullying Stephen, so I said, "Why do you not stand up for yourself?"
What is the best Christmas present ever? A broken drum! You just can't beat it!
What do you call an angry reindeer? RUDE-olph!
What is Santa's favorite breakfast? Snowflakes!
What do you get if you eat Christmas decorations? Tinsel-itis!
Did you know that big black dicks can be weapons and can kill people?
Floyd Mayweather proved it when he gave it to Logan Paul in the ass.
Why did the chicken cross the road because he wanted to get run over and poop, and he died for 30 years until he was sent to Joe for getting run over, and he got killed by something, and then he died, and then he got it by you poop.
Did you know your pupils are the last part to stop working when you die? They dilate.
Gwen, are you there?
Are you a red light? Because I stop every time I see you.