Writing jokes
Hi, um okay... Knock! Knock! Who's there? Doris! Doris who? Doris look I need the key!
Um...oh here another one! Okay...so sorry I type random things on these joke sites...anyway...okay. What is a book never written: "Beautiful sites of the corel rife written by the ocean!"
A hunter shot holes into his favorite book.
When confronted, he said it was the "holey" Bible!
I'm trying to come up with a set-up for an amputee joke, but I'm stumped.
I brought a new pen that can write underwater. It can also write other words.
Hey, y'all, I just wanna say thanks to Gwen on here. She writes jokes, and she got me through a lot xx.
I wrote an essay today about Africa, and I FAILED even though I wrote a perfect rendition of the Hunger Games storyline.
I can't handle these puns...
But I can HAND you some puns!
Budum tiss!
My sister says I’m annoying, or that’s what I read in her diary.
Okay, what do you call a dummy that writes a dumb writer?
Salman Rushdie got a new book out.
It's called "Buddha. You Fat Cunt."
What do you call a broken pencil? Never mind, it's pointless!
My pencil sharpener broke, so now my pencil is pointless.
Yo mama is so fat that I could write 3 paragraphs, and she still wouldn’t fit.
We wrote letters to a kid with cancer.
My letter read, "It's a bumpy road, but soon you will have a straight path."
People didn't realize it was meant for his heart monitor. Lol.
The kid with a gun walked into my classroom and fucking shot the teacher.
He pointed the gun at me and asked, "What's 2+2?" I answer him and he writes the answer down on his test. He did this with every kid. He got a 100%, expelled, and a lifetime in prison. Hey, at least he gets free food.
Did you know an eraser on a pencil slowly dies from your mistakes?
And did you know you're actually supposed to live for 25 minutes, but every time you breathe, it resets time?
"Can I tell you a paper joke?" I said, "But it is pretty terrible."
Why couldn't Sally write with the pen? (Friend: Idk, why?) Because she had no arms.
Why couldn't Sally play Tennis? (Friend: Because she had no arms?) Yes, she had no arms.
Why did Sally fall off the swing? (Friend: Because she had no arms?) No, Joe pushed her.
Why couldn't Sally pick up the box? (Friend: *Some weird guess*) Because she had no arms.
Why did Sally drop her ice cream? (Friend: Because she had no arms?) Because she got hit by a bus.
Knock Knock. (Friend: Who's there?) Not Sally.
How do you turn the Roman numeral IX (9) to a six?
Add the "S."
As he threw the mechanical pencil toward me, I knew that if I didn't move, I would be lead into serious trouble.