Wordplay jokes
What do you call an Italian with a rubber toe?
Roberto.
A guy walks up to me in the street and asks if you have to include the name of an animal in every sentence. I said only if it's relephant.
He says what about vegetables. I said not nesecelery.
Why is 8 scared of 7?
Because 7 8 9. If you think it doesn't make sense, then it is "7 ate 9."
What do you call an annoyed octopus?
Octopissy.
Why are fish easy to measure?
Because they bring their own scales.
Why did the duck walk across the road? I lost my pecker!
How many Mexicans does it take to change a light bulb? -- Just Juan.
I saw a dwarf scaling down a prison wall. I thought to myself, "That's a little condescending."
Knock knock?
Who's there?
Willis.
Willis who?
Willis dick fit in yo mouth?!
Spell Mississippi.
M-I-S-S-I-P-P~
Haha you said pp.
Yo mama so ugly that when she watched The Outsiders, they became The Insiders.
What kind of car does an Indian person drive? A Pri-yas.
What do cows use to do their homework? A cowculator.
Why did Steven Hawking have no friends?
He couldn’t stand anyone...
It's ice to see you.
What do you call autistic people with guns? Special forces.
What do you call an expert fisherman? A "MASTER-BAITER".
Do you know what SAWCON is?
SAWCON deez nuts.
So you know those people that commit suicide by hanging themselves? I guess they lost Hangman.
What do you call it when a man is scared in Panera Bread?
Panera dread.