Wordplay jokes
Youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu.
Why did Steven Hawking have no friends?
He couldn’t stand anyone...
Did you hear about the blind prostitute?
Well, you gotta hand it to her.
The Breakfast Couples: (Bacon) - Don't go bacon my heart.
(Egg) - I couldn't if I fried.
Why did the Duck go to rehab?
Because he was a Quackhead.
Who’s the hottest girl in the world?
Babe Ruth cuz she catches the sun.
Knock knock. "Who's there?" "Grandma." "Oh, okay."
Nah, it's a penis.
What is the difference between Trump and a flying pig? The letter F.
What unit of measurement is used on farms? Barn yards.
What do you get when Glen fucks an orange?
Adam.
They are making a movie about clocks.
It’s about time.
Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? The "p" is silent.
What do you call a girl with only one arm and leg?
Eileen.
Dad: 🦆
Kid: ?
Dad: 🦆🦆
Kid: Huh?
Dad: Ur too late...
Kid: WHAT!
Dad: .... GOOSE!
When Stephen Hawking was feeling hungry, he used to call in to his local PC World for a megabyte and some microchips.
Be warned, if you are in the shower, I might pikachu and it's not my fault if I see any jigglypuffs.
What do you say to an upset Down syndrome person? "What's bringing you down?"
What's a cat's favorite color? Purr-ple.
What do you call a Roman with hair in his teeth?
A "glad-he-ate-her".
What do you call a retard in a house fire?
Flame Retardant.