Woman jokes

The ocean didn't start smelling like fish until women started swimming in it.

I like my women like I like my wine.

Twelve years old and tied up in my basement.

Me: "Hey, you trashy pig woman, go in the toilet or lay on the grass where you belong."

Trashy pig woman: "Why?"

Because you smell like fart, and you're pretty much just a turd with lips.

Stop joking about Helen Keller so much! It’s rude, poor woman! You all just wait till she hears about this!

Why did God give women legs?

1. To look at.

2. To wrap around your neck when you’re eating her out.

You ever had sex with a woman that is so fat, it counted as a threesome?

Vagina?

What is not the definition of prostitution?

A dumb blonde that got money for babysitting. Does it cycle now?

A German soldier was walking down the street in a hail storm and a woman got hit unconscious. He ran over to see if she was ok. Other people came running over. They asked what happened, and the German soldier said, "Hail hit her."

What do you call a mix of nuts, bolts, and my ex?

A roTHOT.

What do you call someone that is Mexican that has a BMW?

A big Mexican woman.

What do you get when you cross breed a woman and a horse? A neigh-ga.

One day a woman met with a man behind an abandoned shop.

The man asked for some crack.

The woman turned around and said, "Here."

That's where the crack was, you guessed it.

The next day, she wiped it clean, ready for the next guest who "wanted crack."

You walk into an area that has big asses on the wall, and they feel lifelike, so you put your dick into them, and you go on the opposite side of the wall, and women are naked through the wall.

One day I was working at the bank, doing my job. Then suddenly a woman asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over. Then I told her that her balance is un-balanced.

Women will always be superior to men. After all, they are FEmale (Fe - iron, male - man).

I rule my women with an IRON FIST!!

Yeah, literally an iron that my fist is clenching against her face.

Why are women in love with plastic because they had a plastic "galflalflflfalfl?"

A woman asked Stephen Hawking to dance, and he replied, "I'm not much good, I have two left feet."

"Then how about Karaoke?"

To which he replied, "I have two left throats."

Your hairline is so bad that it turned Wonder Woman into Failure Man.