Woman jokes
"The only way I'd want to be reincarnated is if I can be reincarnated as a man," said the young woman.
"Why?" said her friend.
"Oh, I don't know, just men are so cool,"
"Is that the only reason?" said her friend.
"Maybe........" said the young woman. "Maybe."
What did the headless horseman say to the woman?
"Give me head."
Alright, what do you call a blank piece of paper?
Women's rights.
Why do women rub their eyebrows? They don't got balls to scratch!
She's a 10, but she doesn't like sex.
Why is it everyone wants to rub a pregnant woman's stomach but never the man's balls where the baby actually came from and the real ones that deserve the congratulations?
What's better, a woman or a man?
Neither, for I am WHITE.
What do trans women bring to lesbian relationships?
Something big and warm 🍆.
How can you tell that a woman cannot fit through a vent because she got pregnant from a baby elephant? Ain't no telling who's in better shape, the elephant or the woman. I guess it's probably Weight Watchers.
I'm not saying I'm ugly...
But when I'm watching porn, the hot, sexy women in my area always pop up and ask me if I'm rich.
I wish death was in the form of a woman.
That way, it would never come for me.
Three men die at the same time and go to Heaven. St. Peter says to them, "It's going to be a long journey to heaven, so I will give you a good vehicle depending on how much you've cheated on your wives."
"We'll start with you, Michael. Since you were quite the womanizer and cheated on your wife multiple times, you will be getting a Toyota." The man, embarrassed, left in the Toyota.
"Nolan, you were better; you cheated on your wife twice, so I will give you a Mercedes. Now, as for you, Mark, you never cheated on your wife; you are an absolute saint, so I will be giving you a Lamborghini."
The man in the Toyota saw the man with the Lamborghini the next day crying like a child on his car, and he asked the man in the Lamborghini, "What the hell is going on?"
The man in the Lamborghini says, "I just saw my wife riding through the streets of Heaven on roller skates!"
Why did the woman feel ugly?
A. Nobody would even rape her.
If a WOMAN gets RAPED, RUN INTO THE SECNE AND HELP HER.
What do you call a gay woman? I don't know.
Yo momma so fake, even Barbie got jealous of her!
What do you get when you cross breed a woman and a horse? A neigh-ga.
A woman has been raped by a man. She calls the police, and a policeman shows up.
Woman: "Please help, officer! I have been raped!"
Officer: "No problem, ma'am, I will just unrape you."
Woman: "What? Unrape me? How?"
Officer proceeds to bring back the rapist and forces the woman to rape the rapist back in order to cancel out the initial rape.
What does a woman’s pussy and a chainsaw have in common?
Miss by a few inches and you’re in deep shit.
What is the fastest way to spread a rumor?
Telephone? No.
Television? No.
How then? Tell a woman!