When jokes
Who needs Singles Day when you're single for the rest of your life!
What do you get when you have a class of kids and a speeding car?
A 24 killstreak!
When your grades get mailed to your house when you expect to get them in school.
When you get home, your mom is there with the belt, going 1k miles per hour.
When the emo kid says let’s play truth or dare, You know it’s about to hang over.
Yo mama so fat, when she sat on the roof of a Walmart, it lowered the prices.
Memes
When does an emo get jealous at a phone?
When it dies.
When you get injured 😢
When you get injured in America 😭😭😭😭💵💵💵💵💵🏩🏩🏩
When you ask an orphan to come over:
Kid: "Do you want to come over to my house?"
Orphan: "Yeah, sure."
Kid: "Ok, ask your parents—oh wait."
Yo hairline so bad when people see it, they turn to stone.
Unbelievable! When doctors touch my body, it’s alright, but if I do the same to some lady, apparently it’s "harassment!"
Yo mama is so fat that when she walked past the TV, I missed three episodes.
What happens when a cow farm gets destroyed, then built up again?
It'll be udder renovation!
What did the dad say when he left the lollipop store?
"Cya suckers!🍭"
"When someone asks for a dad joke and you send them to the orphan page."
I was in math class when my teacher gave us homework, and she said to me, "You're gonna get an F this time." So I went back home, and f**k my teacher.
What did the pirate say when he saw a ghost? He said, "Oh my God, it's me dead parrot!"
One day, I was walking through a park when I realized it was crowded.
To this day, I still don't know who let the children out of my basement.
What happens when there's ten people in one house and they all have to shit and there's one bathroom?
It's a motherfucking shitshow party!
What do you call it when a cow gets disciplined by her parents?
Grounded beef.
You lost 30 lbs when you joined Weight Watchers, and lost another 10 lbs when they shaved your back.