When jokes
Where do sex addicts go when they need to talk? Hoe-and-Tell.
What do you get when you throw a pile of dead babies into a fryer?
Kentucky Fried Children!
What's it called when you eat those same babies?
Finger Lickin' Good!
My mom said she wanted to be a comedian when she grows up. So after she was an adult, she had kids. When they were old enough, she told them you could be whatever you want...
Your mum so fat that when she sat down she said, "Why are there so many people under me?"
What is the difference between a gay person and a refrigerator?
The refrigerator doesn’t start moaning and groaning when you try to put the meat in.
Memes
me when i realized that buildings don't make earth any heavier cuz all the materials were already used on it.
You are American when you walk to the bathroom. What are you when you are in there?
You're-a-peein'. European.
What did Joe say when he saw his girlfriend sleeping with his sister?
Nothing, he just started wanking.
I'm so poor that when people come over to my house, I come out the window and say, "Ding Dong!"
What did the sweet potato say to the potato when he was told to hurry?
I yam.
People always ask what the secret of our family's happiness is. It is simple really.
1. Television and computer games are limited to a couple of hours each week.
2. We all give each other a hand when needed.
Last but not least, we play Twister.
What did they call Susan B. Anthony when she was sleeping on the job?
Snoozin' B. Anthony!
What did Stephen Hawking's computer say when he died?
"ERROR"
Good Evening Twitter, this is your boy EatDatPussy445, and about like 30-45 minutes ago, I beat the f*** out of my dick so god damn hard that I can't even feel my left leg, my left leg has went totally numb. And, my dick has also went totally numb, to the point where it feels f***ing weird when I go and take a piss.
Right, I have a dog and his name is Syndrome, and whenever he is good, I go "Good Syndrome," but whenever he is naughty, I go "Down Syndrome."
What do you get when you put a baby in a box filled with glass and nails and push it down the stairs?
... A boner.
Yo mama is so fat when she sees a bus full of white people, she thinks it's a Twinkie, lmao xd.
Man, don't you hate it when you hit a speed bump by an orphanage but then realize there's no speed bumps here...
What's the difference between Paul Walker and a PC?
When my PC crashes, I actually give a fuck.
Slavery has existed in the western world for 3 centuries, but in the Arab regions it has existed before and is still going on, so why don’t people talk about it?
Because it’s only bad when white people do it.
When my girlfriend broke up with me, I took her wheelchair. I always knew she would come crawling back.