Zone jokes

When you hit a speed bump in a school zone and then you remember there are no speed bumps.

What's an orphan's favorite battle zone? The home front.

There is one good part about paedophiles... they go slow in school zones.

Q: What’s a good thing about child molesters?

A: They drive slow through school zones.

Billy and Bobby were walking to school one day. Billy pulled out an mp3 player.

"What's that?" Bobby inquired.

"Oh, just something to zone out the other kids," Billy responded.

The next day, Billy and Bobby were walking to school. Billy rummaged through his backpack and pulled out an mp4 player this time.

"Woah! What's that?" Bobby inquired.

"Oh, just a lil something to shut out the annoying kids at school," Billy responded.

The next day, Bobby noticed Billy's backpack was particularly heavy looking. Billy rummaged through his backpack just outside the school and pulled out an mp5 rifle.

"Holy shit, dude! What the fuck is that for?" Bobby gasped.

"Nice huh? This'll shut those fuckers up for good!" Billy replied.

Welcome to the Friend Zone! It’s lonely here.

Your hairline is so far back, it was in a different time zone on a flight with you.

An Asian walked up to another Asian that was crying.

He asked, "Is somting wong?"

The other guy says, "I was i a noh paking zon."

How do pedophiles follow the law?

They drive it slow in the school zone.

What’s one good thing about child molesters? They drive slow in a school zone.

I went 80 mph in a school zone and one of the speed bumps screamed, "Am I hallucinating?"

Your mum is so fat, she needs 3 different watches for 3 different time zones.

Why can't Michael Jackson go within 500m of a school zone?

Because he's dead.

When you see an "Autistic child zone" sign and say, "Oh! That wasn't a dog."

When the speedbump in a school zone screams, so you go faster.

What is the good thing about child molesters? They drive slow in school zones.

Yo mama so fat that she needs two watches for two different time zones.

Friend: Why did you touch me?

Me: That guy in the corner with no hair, glasses, really nice, white button up shirt, that drives a white van slow by school zones told me to and he would give me hard candy.

Yo mama is so fat that she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl and a plate and ketchup to the red zone.

When you run over a speed bump in a school zone and you remember that there are no speed bumps.