When jokes
Your mama is so fat that when she sat down on the couch for a family picture, it was just her.
When you were born, you were so ugly that the doctors slapped your parents!
When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car.
When I called the suicidal hotline in Iraq, they asked if I could drive the car.
When you step on the scales, it says "to be confined."
Memes
When one just isn't enough
When they said Titanic was "unsinkable," then they said, "The World Trade Centers was uncollapsible."
How do you know when it's bedtime in the Netherlands?
When the big hand touches the little hand.
What do you get when you cross a lawn mower and a parakeet?
Shredded tweet!
Yo mama so fat, when she goes on a diet, it ends world hunger.
One day I went to smoke weed with some Mexicans, but they ran away when I asked if they had papers.
What do you get when you mix a lemon and a cat?
A sourpuss.
When you're at a funeral and you laugh at the body... everyone stares, and one person said, "Isn't that your mom...?"
What happens to a baby when you let it run loose? It can't cause it can't run yet.
When you say to your friend, "I've got your back," then at his funeral you see in his coffin he's missing his middle piece.
When you’re trying to attract a partner, it’s important to project the qualities you desire. Shit, have I had to suck a lot of cock lately!?
What did the mouse 🐭 say when his friend broke their teeth?
Hard cheese! 🧀😂
What do you get when you cross a pedophile and an elementary school? Predator 3.
Why do they call them apartments when they are together?
Fat people should expect big things when they take their shirt off.
What do you call a stoner when horny?
A weed whacker!