Whats jokes
"What's the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?
One weighs a ton, and the other is a little lighter!"
My dog is a genius... I asked him what is two minus two, he said nothing.
What do you call a paralyzed kid with a gun?
Special Forces.
What shoe shop would be a lesbian's best friend, decimen?
What's the difference between a Mexican and a Black person? One gets paid, the other got enslaved.
"What do you give a man that has everything? Penicillin."
What’s the difference between a pickpocket and a peeping tom?
One snatches your watch. The other watches your snatch.
I was at work and a few fat women came up to me and asked for some help.
Later that week, I ran into them on the dance floor. One of them asked me if I wanted to dance. I told her no. The other asked me if I knew what was cracking. I calmly said, "The floor."
What do you call an emo girl with a flat chest?
A cutting board.
I've asked so many people what LGBTQ stands for. So far, no one has given me a straight answer.
What do hockey players and Surrey girls have in common?
They both only change their pads after every third period!
What’s one thing Obama proved during his presidency?
No matter how far a brotha gets in life, he’s still going to have the cops on his back.
What's the difference between 9/11 and a cow?
You can't milk a cow for over 10 years.
Person 1: “How many ph vids have you watched today?”
Person 2: “Seven.”
Person 1: “What the fuck, dude.”
Person 2: “I know, right? I’ve gotten seven ads for Pizza Hut in the past hour.”
(Based on an encounter I had recently)
What do you call a rapper who's also a magician?
MC Presto.
God creates dog.
God: "You are man's best friend."
Dog: "That's pretty sexist."
God: "No, man as in- You know what, FUCK IT! You can't speak!"
Dog: "....."
God: "And chocolate kills you!"
Dog: "🐶"
What do you call a rapper who becomes a chef?
A LYRICAL COOK!
What's a rapper's favorite drink?
RHYME-A-RITA
What's one thing your dad shares with black men? Your sister.
I can't not believe you stupid fucks. This isn't funny. Just like a bunch of cunts not to believe there is nothing can't do.
BTW what do you call a manly woman's cunt? Nothing. Who gives a fuck?