Whats jokes
I was 11 or 12 at the time.
Guy (passing me): "How are you doing?" Me, an autist: "Pretty bad honestly." Guy (continued walking past me) Me: ...
If you didn’t know, “what’s up” and “how are you doing” are phatic expressions in the United States, meaning that they’re said as greetings even though they literally mean something else.
What’s the difference between depression and your ex?
Depression fucks you harder.
What is 80 feet wide and has 22 teeth?
Answer: The front row of a Trump Rally!
What did the ocean say to the pirate? Nothing, it just waved.
What's the difference between apples and orphans?
An apple gets picked.
What do you call an emo committing suicide while filming it?
America's Funniest Home Videos.
What's the only good thing about being an orphan?
All snacks are family sized!
Q: What do Burger King and Michael Jackson have in common?
A: They put meat on five-year-old buns.
What's the best part about a dead hooker? The second hour is free!
What's an orphan's high school nickname? "Lone Stone."
You know what an emo gets for his birthday? A rope.
What is red and goes 200 miles per hour?
A baby in a blender.
What do apples and depressed kids have in common?
They both hang on trees.
What do you call a vegan slut?
A garden ho!
What is it called when an orphan takes a selfie?
A family photo.
My sister asked me what is dark humor. I asked what does a cannibal call a pregnant woman? "Kinder Surprise!"
What do you call a cow that's beating his meat? Beef stroganoff!
Teacher: Where's your homework?
Student: At home...
Teacher: What's it doing there?
Student: Having a better time than me.
What sort of file turns a one inch hole into a two inch hole?
A pedophile.
What is the worst thing you can find out about a woman on a first date?
She claims to have been raped. Then, you know to get as far away from her as possible because she's probably a feminazi bitch.