Weapon jokes
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun?
Special Forces!! HAHAHA
Who is white, hairy, and rusty in the tree?
It's Rambo Rabbit with a big gun that was.
What weapon does a fat Jedi use?
A heavy saber.
How many guns can an octopus hold?
9
"Remember, switching to your pistol is always faster than reloading."
- Sun Tzu, The Art of War.
The way to stop school shootings is to give children an RPG.
I thought I had the best K/D ratio in my fighter jet on Battlefield, then I heard about Mohammed Atta.
Why can’t anyone sing “hit me with your best shot” at the veterans ball karaoke?
Because every time she sang the line “fire away,” someone started shooting!
If the noose breaks, stab yourself!
If the knife is dull, shoot yourself!
If the gun's out of ammo, *YOU'RE HERE TO SUFFER ETERNALLY.*
Get the gun, shoot it up your bum!
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun? Special forces.
What do Hitler's gas "shower" and guns have in common? They both kill someone.
Why do American guns only have 30 rounds?
Because it's the average class size.
Why does the military pick orphans as fighter pilots?
Because homing missiles don't work on them.
What would you do after seeing your most loved one shot? Reload.
Roses are red, so is my gun. Why do you ask? Because it's full of blood.
What can't a sniper say to his wife?
"I missed you."
I threw my boomerang and now I live in constant fear.
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun?
Answer: Special forces.
I tried to fight a razor. It cut me so deep I thought I would die.
Turns out he didn't kill me. I was never happy, but that shit made me angry.