Weapon jokes
"Remember, switching to your pistol is always faster than reloading."
- Sun Tzu, The Art of War.
The way to stop school shootings is to give children an RPG.
I tried to fight a razor. It cut me so deep I thought I would die.
Turns out he didn't kill me. I was never happy, but that shit made me angry.
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun?
Answer: Special forces.
Steps to win a Nerf war:
Step 1. Take out Nerf bullets.
Step 2. Load hollow points.
Step 3. Win!
Memes
What did Cinderella say when she got to the ball? Glock, glock.
What's small and can't turn around in a hallway?
A baby with a javelin in its head!
I barged into a Halloween party at my school with my air-soft AR-15!
I was so scary, EVERYONE ran away!
Why can't weapons play baseball?
Because they need to get to home base.
I am armed with an automatic 4-OXD 22. caliber machine gun. HANDS IN THE AIR!
What did the Deagle say to the G17?
"Son, you're rushing, but in some way, I like it."
AR-15: Who are you?
Musket: I'm you, but from another timeline.
DB: I'm the only shotgun with more than 1 barrel!
Lancaster: Are you sure about that?
DB: huh?
Lancaster: I have 4 barrels!
DB: WHAT!?
Penta Barrel: I got 5!
DB: *insert becoming uncanny*
Dual Hexagon shotgun: I got 12!
The others: HOW!?
*and that's how an argument started.*
*Shotguns in a nutshell*
2B: MUST.
4B: ADD.
6B: MORE.
12B: *B A R R E L S*
*And that's how multi-barrel shotguns were made.*
What's after R-P-G?
W.
I don’t know why I’m in jail. So, basically, I was at a gun range, and we were supposed to hit the targets, even though I hit it.
I’m gonna put my AR 15 up your fucking ass and pull the trigger!
Why did the bullet end up losing his job?
Because he got fired!
A bomb is like a baby; when you drop it, everyone screams.
Making a comforting breakfast.
But you have a knife.