Water jokes
What do you call a special ed class that’s flooded?
Vegetable soup.
I went to the aquarium this weekend, but I didn’t stay long. There’s something fishy about that place.
I got caught peeing in the pool.
The lifeguard blew his whistle so hard I nearly fell in!
A burger walks into a bar and says, "Hi sir, can I have a glass of water?"
And the waiter says, "I'm sorry sir, we don't serve food here."
Why did the whale cross the ocean?
To get to the other tide!!! 😂
I want to di... dive! Yeah!
I took a sip of water.
Why do orphans become criminals? To know what it’s like to be wanted.
Why are orphans bad at poker? They don’t know what a full house is.
I saw a child crying yesterday, so I asked him where his parents were. Bad move. I got fired from my job at the orphanage.
What do you call an orphan’s family reunion? Me time.
Did you know? The letter ‘f’ in orphan stands for family.
What is an orphan’s least favorite song? We Are Family.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite TV show? Family Guy.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite movie? Meet the Parents.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite type of music? House.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite store? Home Depot.
What’s an orphan’s favorite band? Foster the People.
What do you call a virgin from Alabama? An orphan.
Where do orphan chickens end up? Foster Farms.
What beer do orphans drink? Foster’s.
Why do orphans have water with their cereal? Because their dad never came back with the milk.
What do you call a fish with no parents? An orfin.
Why do orphans like playing tennis? Because it’s the only love they get.
Me: Are you an orphan? Orphan: Yes, what gave me away? Me: Your parents.
"Jack and Jill went home because he was sick because of the virus in town, gave him a frown, and his arms were pricked."
Tides right?
I set fiya to the rain! Wait, no, that ain't possible, what... I evaporated the rain!
What's a current's favorite juice?
Black "current"!
What is yellow and can’t swim? A school, but full of drowning kids! 🤣🤣🤣
RIP boiled water.
You will be mist.
That dam looks damn cool!
Me: “You guys wanna know a cool fact?”
Friend 1: “Yeah.”
Friend 2: “Yea.”
Me: “Japan is RIGHT that way. If we swim all night...we’ll be able to get to Japan.”
Friend 3: “I love anime.”
Friend 1 & 2: “Nononononononononono!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
Me: *Laughs at Friend 3*
What do you call the bear that pushes all the other bears into the pool? The dry bear.
Booooooooooooo!
Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack was surprised to see she had different eyes, and that’s when he realized... Jack had fucked Jill’s daughter.
Woman gets pulled over by a cop.
Cop: "Ma'am, have you been drinking?"
Lady: "No, officer."
Cop: "What's that in your cup then, ma'am?"
Lady: "Just water, officer."
Cop: "Looks like wine to me."
Lady: "Oh my god, Jesus did it again!"